Directed by Jonathan Liebesman
Starring Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson
Running Time 99 Minutes, Rated PG-13
2 Mitch’s out of 5
Mitch Hansch/ movieswithmitch.com
The sequel to 2010’s “Clash of the Titans” is more of the same and just as lame.
This is embarrassing, but I actually got a little pumped up for this one before going in to watch it. That slick little trailer with a well used “Sweet Dreams” from Marilyn Manson gave me some of the fanboy adrenaline goose pimples. Too many times, a finely edited trailer has suckered me in, being my achilles heel, and “Wrath of the Titans” proves to be no different. A what-not-to-do summer special effects laden sequel movie. Sure, you can slap a better CGI coat on than the atrocious Clash predecessor to make it look like a Ferrari, but underneath Wrath’s slick paint job is the same old dull hero’s fight against angry Greek gods that rides like a Ford Pinto.
There’s more to root for in my lunch sandwich selection (Turkey swiss w/ pickles or crunchy peanut butter and strawberry jelly- who knows?) than any of the dullards taking up screen time. Whether it’s the combined four screenwriters with dialogue like, “we only have so much time before Zeus’ life force is zapped”, or director Jonathan Liebesman’s (Battle Los Angeles) mistaking special effects for plot, or Sam Worthington’s humorless performance (seriously, I got more laughs out of Streep in “Sophie’s Choice”).
The bulky Brit Worthington returns as half God half man Perseus. Famous for his Kraken slaying days, he now prefers a low profile as a humble fisherman widower trying to be the best daddy he can be. Perseus’ daddy, Zeus (Liam Neeson) brings bad news that all Hades is breaking loose, and that Perseus will need to do battle once again. Turns out, the gods run on prayer power, and with human seriously lacking in that department, that previous life force is being zapped. Hades (Ralph Fiennes) and scorned son of Zeus, Ares (Édgar Ramírez) use this to their advantage, devising to unleash father of all Gods, Kronos (a silly hot lava god), to regain their godly power.
From there, it’s a collection of interesting set pieces that has Perseus battling Cyclops, deadly labyrinth, and a very tame minotaur. Neeson and Fiennes dress up and get to collect their checks. Allies are made; the wasted Rosamund Pike plays Andromeda, who we know is supposed to come around as a love interest to Perseus eventually, but we could care less, and the other half god Agenor played Toby Kebbell doing a second rate Russell Brand impression. When the cagey Bill Nighy pops in bringing some actual energy to the film it feels alien and before you can adjust he’s outta of the film.
In the barrage of lightning bolts and fireballs there isn’t an actual drop of emotion earned. Where any enjoyment is in “Wrath of the Titans” is all Greek to me.
“Where any enjoyment is in “this” is all Greek to me.